It's early yet and the sparse numbers at this social haven't reached a critical mass where people step out of their inhibitions to chat, munch, and dance. But I see two people whom I know come from opposite ends of the continent, who've never met, and yet are snuggling and reminiscing as if they've shared a common experience, like having dined at the same table of delight. They squeeze together on the couch as if the empty room were too crowded. Their shoulders relaxed, I imagine a broad gate swinging to open up the protective stockade that conventionally surrounds the heart. It looks like they're coming on to each other but I know they're not.
This terrible cartoon comes to mind where the shepherd is hitching up his pants and the sheep is saying, "Does this mean we're going steady?" I'm remembering how sometimes it's hard to keep from loading encounters down with bags full of unspoken commitments.
I imagine a world where people are comfortable knowing we all need touch, knowing that babies die without it, and knowing a touch is just a touch, a world where whatever I'm doing with someone, we know the event equals the event, and there aren't any unspoken commitments assumed or intended.
I imagine running into a friend on the street and falling into a delicious heart to heart hug, relaxed in knowing whatever we're feeling is OK.
I imagine telling a beautiful person I love them and they say, "You have good taste." Rather than, "I'm sorry. I'm spoken for."
I Imagine a world where you don't keep grudges, collecting evidence like collecting grocery stamps to put in a book to lambaste me with when you've finally collected enough. I imagine a world where, as soon as an upset arises, you bring it to me in a desire to return to love.
I imagine gazing into your eyes in comfort and caring, searching behind your eyes for that place within, that is just like me, where I meet the mirror that makes us one.
I imagine a world where people don't try to fix me when I unburden my problems, a world where I'll just be heard and loved. When I say how sad I'm feeling, or guilty, or insecure, I imagine my partner flashing me an 'I love you' sign with their hand, so as not to interrupt or try to rob me of my experience, but rather trust that I am the master of my own healing.
I imagine a world where everyone wins.
I'm creating this world for myself, person by person by person. Some of you reading this article right now are doing it too -- sharing that world. And anyone who'd like to join, just whistle. You know how to whistle, don't you?
Eric Nagler Eric has been involved with peaceful conflict resolution throughout most of his life. In 1963 he marched through Mississippi with Martin Luther King, encouraging people to register to vote. He came to Canada in 1968 as a conscientious objector to war, returning to The United States in 1972 to stand trial for draft evasion. He was acquitted. In 1996 Eric journeyed to China as a member of a Citizen's Diplomacy tour led by Dr. Stan Dale of the Human Awareness Institute (HAI). This experience, coupled with the HAI workshops he has participated in, has motivated Eric to focus more directly on conflict resolution and facilitating people to bring more awareness and love into their lives, helping create a world where everyone wins. In April 1999 Eric spent a month in Bosnia performing for war affected children and families (Bosnia).
Eric Nagler Eric has been involved with 