Same Old Seat

Then when I became a college professor I really began to notice this—there’s no assigned seating, but the students have all chosen particular areas of the classroom that they sit in week after week. Occasionally you see a little shuffling around, but usually some people prefer the front seats, some people prefer the middle seats, and some people prefer the back seats. I began to think that there was a pattern there, like the students in the front were the ones who were out to get an A and the ones in the back were the ones who didn’t really want to be there. But whatever their reasons, students kept going to the same old seats.

So this is my point: your mind is like a classroom. And the tendency is to find a favorite place of your mind that seems comfortable to you, for reasons you may not even be aware of, and to go there, time after time after time—same old seat.

For different people, it’s different parts of the mind that they continually go to. For some people, it’s the analytical mind, and they approach every situation from a kind of intellectual standpoint—always analyzing, always questioning and criticizing. They go to that part of their mind repeatedly and habitually, without even knowing why, because that part is so familiar to them.

With other people it’s particular ideological positions, a particular belief system. They always go there because it’s comfortable and familiar to them, and they see everything through the prism of that, whether it’s a religious belief or a political belief or a just a belief about the way the world works. They like to go there and stay there rather than trying to see the world from any other philosophical framework; it’s a place they go, time after time after time.

With yet other people, there are emotional states that they go to repeatedly. For some it’s anger—it doesn’t take much and they’re right there, fuming over something. For other people it’s resentment, or some kind of indignation at the world. Or it can be worrying about everything. Or feeling sad. It could be any kind of emotion, and someone will go there repeatedly.

There’s a lot of different places that different people use as the same old seat, and they’re not always aware of why they find that place comfortable. Seeing the world this way, or through this feeling, seems normal to them; they don’t question it too much. Different times when I asked students in the back of the classroom to come in the front so we could have a class discussion more easily, they would resist, arguing “I just like it here, I’m more comfortable.” And I think that’s the way people are about their habitual mental states; they just know it’s comfortable and resist stepping outside that. There are reasons people go to particular mind states, having to do with habit, the way they were raised, or the kind of temperament they have, but it’s not as important to know what the reasons are as to be aware that you’re doing it. If you’re not aware of doing it, you won’t make any effort to stop going there because it’s the easy place to go. Your mind moves there and you go right with it and you’re there.

But you also have to have a motivation for breaking free of this, because at first it’s going to take a little effort. Why would you want to stop going to that mind state? In short the answer is to be free. Going to a habitual mind state is just giving in to a sleep state; it’s like dreams while you’re sleeping, they take you wherever they’re going to go and you have little control over it. If you get pulled into habitual mind states you’re not free, you’re in a semi-sleep state. You’re just responding to stimuli outside of you that evoke patterns that have formed in your mind over time, and you have no control over this.

Habitual mind states are also disruptive to your happiness, not only because they’re often unpleasant in themself, but because they are hard on your relationships with other people. If you’re habitually suspicious of other people’s intentions people are going to avoid you, or they’re going to act in a way that confirms your suspicions because they don’t trust you. If you go to an anger state habitually of course people are going to try to avoid you and you’re going to be alienating them or causing contention. If you go to an analytical state all the time people will find you cold, a little distant, and it will be hard to build relationships that have a sense of warmth in them.

So if you want freedom, if you want a happier life, then it’s a matter of getting a little distance from the state you habitually go to and practicing not going there. Not going there simply means catching yourself as you’re being pulled in that direction and redirecting your attention. Do something that’s not related to that mind state. For example, if you’re beginning to feel angry, go do something that would calm you. Such a simple thing, but it also means you’re beginning to break a habit.

Meditation is a good way of becoming aware of how your mind moves. When you see things come up during your meditation practice, you’re becoming more aware of how your mind habitually moves to certain types of states. It gives you that little bit of distance from it so you’re not just going with it but watching it as it moves, and then you can carry that attentiveness over to your day-to-day life so you can catch yourself as your mind takes you to these kinds of places.

If you find yourself in the midst of your habitual state and remember your intention to break free of it, it’s a matter of looking back to see what was it that triggered the state and being more attentive in those triggers in the future. Examine the mental process in retrospect and become more aware of the steps that led into that state. This kind of review will help you to catch yourself a little earlier next time, before the state of mind gathers momentum and takes over.

The ultimate aim, though, is to be able to walk into that classroom and just be free of having to sit anywhere in particular—you can sit here, you can sit there; it’s a true choice and not simply a comfortable habit. This is what I mean by the awake state of mind, by freedom, liberation. At least that much, to know how your mind habitually functions and not letting it take you somewhere automatically, unconsciously. For the mind is not to be the master of the spirit, but rather the spirit should be the master of the mind.

© 2009 Alan F. Zundel

Alan F. Zundel is a counselor, author, and teacher currently living in Eugene, Oregon. His talks are available to download for free at HeartAwake Center at www.heartawake.org.